Your husband is abusive to you, but you are surprised that he is abusing your child.

Your husband is abusive to you, but you are surprised that he is abusing your child.


Image of eye courtesy of Pixabay

Hello everyone,
I know I haven't been posting in a while, but I want to quickly touch on this conversation.

Many of you are in abusive marriages and relationships and you stay in that relationship for a very long time in hopes that this person will magically change and be a better person.

He has shown you regularly who he is.   You have done the things that you thought would change the relationship for the better, like improving yourself to be everything that you think he wants you to be.

His abusive outburst towards you was never your fault, and he knows this, but he will continue to batter you because you will not step up and put a stop to this madness.

Lately, your child has been crying a lot, and your mate has been slapping this kid around and battering him.  You have made every excuse in the world, and you are too afraid to step up and do something with your life.

Image of a child crying courtesy of Pixabay

If something happens to your beautiful children, you will hold some of the blame, and you don't want that.  Please take hold of your life.  Men are a dime a dozen, and this man who batters you and your children is a terrible person.

You are patiently waiting for him to get himself together, but get your life together and save yourself and your children before something serious happens.

It is never easy to leave someone but think about what could happen if you stay stuck in an abusive marriage.

Hug your child or children and promise them that you will get out of this situation, and you get out of it and stay out of it.

Get involved with the family court to get all the support that you need for yourself and your children.  If you are in this situation or have been in this situation please leave a comment below.

We can see the beauty in everything but ourselves!

We can see the beauty in everything but ourselves!

It is so funny that we can all see the beauty in flowers, art, music, and many other things, but we cannot see the beauty in ourselves.

I had to confront some things in my life because although I am confident in myself, there are times that I second-guess myself.

My sister gave me a compliment and said "You can do anything that you put your mind to," at that time I was dealing with internal discouragement and self-doubt.

She gave me a strange look but never said anything.  Honestly, I was talking myself out of being great.

Many times when you are going through some things, it is so hard to accept praise, and you also don't feel beautiful.

 The truth is, God gave us everything that we need to create a beautiful life, and we just have to grasp
the concept of being everything that he needs us to be, living our best life, and doing the best that we can.

We are beautiful because of the life we were given.  If you do not feel beautiful, he gives us the tools to make ourselves into that beautiful portrait that we wish to be.  No, we may not look beautiful to everyone, but as long as we can live in our beauty and accentuate the positives that we do have, we will live our truth and grab hold of the wonderful things that we are given in this life.

Be beautiful and be great, accept your beauty standard, and live and create your beautiful life.
Take time for yourself and take the time to just relax and smell the beautiful roses.

 Break the habit of self-doubt and believe that you can do anything and have any beautiful thing that the Lord gives you.

Give thanks to the Lord for giving you this life, and don't be afraid to ask him to help you, and make changes in your life that will propel you to move forward and not be stuck in self-doubt.

Carefully plan your family ladies!

Carefully plan your family ladies!

Image courtesy of Pixabay

Hello Ladies, I just want to talk to you for a few minutes.  I have watched many videos on YouTube and I am seeing young women with very large families.  Five children or more; some of you married, some not.

I think having babies and a beautiful family is essential, but I am seeing too many young moms with many children.  Ladies, you will have to think about how this will impact your livelihood.

How are you going to truly be successful while trying to raise all these children?

When your kids get older, it takes an astounding amount of money to clothe and feed these kids.  If you want your kids to go to college, it would be very difficult to send them because of the financial strain.


Image courtesy of Pixabay

I am not trying to be mean, but I want to see women be able to have a fulfilling and prosperous life. If you have a large family, I take my hat off to you because it takes a lot to properly maintain a big family.



If you have a husband, what if he leaves you or passes away, what will you do?
You have to carefully take this into consideration.

Many of you who have these big families are not able to work due to your family size, and it puts an added strain on Men to have to work extra jobs to provide for their family, that means that Dad is never home, and when he is, he doesn't have time to deal with the kids.


Image courtesy Pixabay

What if you and your spouse pass away, who do you think is going to raise all these kids?
I am not scolding you but please think about your future and educate yourself.  You are better than just bearing a lot of kids.

You are great, be great Ladies!

What is keeping you from sleeping at night?

What is keeping you from sleeping at night?

Have you gotten some bad news, a job loss, or a loss of a relationship?  Maybe you just started a job and you feel that it is not going to work out, so you are up at this hour, thinking about what you are going to do.

We all have things that we are dealing with including me. I am up thinking about my future, and my next move.

Counting sheep is not going to work tonight lol. But, if you see that you are not sleeping for a week, then it is time to do something about it.

Go to your doctor or talk to your local Pharmacist to see if they can advise you and get you back to getting a full night's sleep.

I have restless nights from time to time also, but losing sleep is not healthy because it can cause your heart to race, and it will affect your performance at work.

If you are dealing with depression, please find a Therapist and see if this will help you sort things out.
There is no shame in getting healthy physically and mentally.

Also, don't forget to talk to God about your problems, and I just want you to know that bad times don't last forever.

Well, my friend, I have talked enough, so I will now turn over and get some shut-eye, and I hope for the same thing for you. Goodnight!

Are you looking raggedy because you are not in a relationship?

Are you looking raggedy because you are not in a relationship?

I asked this question because I have seen it many times throughout my life.  Heck, I have even done it and didn't know that I was until I looked at some old pictures.

Life happens and depending on what is going on, you may not even care about the way you look.  I am not talking about being super dressed up every day.

What we don't realize is the fact that sometimes we are depressed and don't even know it.  So what your last relationship didn't work.  Fix yourself up and try again if that is what you want to do.


Image courtesy of Pixabay

If you have removed yourself from a relationship and have to start all over again, remember to stay clean and neat.

Take care of your skin and your health because this is very important.  Style your hair in a simple but classic style that is easy to maintain.

When you are not in a relationship, it is the perfect time to concentrate on yourself and pamper yourself.  Don't be so wrapped up in having a relationship that you lose yourself and your self-respect.

Find some new hobbies, watch YouTube videos to learn beauty tips and fill your days and nights with new endeavors to focus your attention on.

I realized that I come first and to never be so wrapped up in another person, that I let myself go.  Make yourself beautiful no matter what your financial status is.

Never compare yourself to another person because you are unique and you possess very special qualities that God put in you.

He never intended for us to be a clone.  So, beautiful lady take care of yourself and love yourself.

Should Your Child Be Wearing That On FaceBook?

Should Your Child Be Wearing That On And FaceBook?



Hello, everyone, I was on FaceBook and I saw young babies as young as two-years-old and up with boots and outfits that are not geared towards kids.

I am going to tell you all something, it is not cute. Ladies you have to be careful oversexualizing your babies.

It is not normal, and it is disgusting.  Sure, your baby is beautiful and precious but to have them in clothes for grown-ups and posing in a provocative manner is asking for trouble.

You don't know who is viewing these pictures or sharing them with other people.  Please stop doing this because it is not healthy.

There is nothing wrong with giving your child a little lip gloss or even the little makeup kits that some of the toy stores sell and if your little girl is eight years old on up it can be fun for her to play with makeup for kids with her friends at home.

Let your child be in the mindset to enjoy kid things and not things for adults.  I have seen little kids dancing provocatively in front of men and their moms think it is so cute.  Then, when something happens to your child you act like you are so surprised.

There is too much going on right now and you cannot be too careful.  On the other side, I have seen moms monitor everything regarding their children and that is the way to go, mom.

Protect your children and stop with this foolishness Ladies!

I Gave Him My Tax Money To Flip So We Could Make More Money.

I Gave Him My Tax Money To Flip So We Could Make More Money.




Hello, everyone, I received this question a while back and didn't get a chance to address it but I am addressing it now.


I received my tax money and my boyfriend asked me for money so he could flip it and make more money.  He took my money and gave it to a man that he met about four months ago, and he said that he trusted this man with (our) money.

I gave my man $2000.00 to give to his friend and then the man my boyfriend gave the money to, took the money and ran.  We cannot find a way to get in touch with this man and it looks like he was using fake names.

I am so upset with my boyfriend because I had plans to use this money for my children, I have two kids that I am supporting on my own.

This was a foolish move on my part, but I honestly thought that this would benefit both of us.



I am going to say this in the best way possible, it seems to me that your (boyfriend) acted like your money was his.  He conned you into believing that this would be beneficial to you just to get your money.

Honestly, your boyfriend owes you this money because he just handed this money over to a stranger or a friend that he didn't know that well.  I have heard a lot of men talking about flipping money and most of them don't have their own money or their own jobs.

These men are using you and other women to finance their business endeavors. And some of them are actually taking this money and doing other things with it, and then they come up with a sad story after they have taken your money to finance their activities.

You said that this money was for your children.  You should have never taken this money that was meant for your kids and just handed it over.

I am sure that you have learned a valuable lesson from this and think about taking your boyfriend to small claims court to get your money back.  You may or may not be successful, but at least he will get the idea that you are not to be played with.

Next time, tell him to use his own money. Do not allow him to get his hands on yours.

You Put Your All Into Your Marriage And He Let You Down, What Should You Do Now?

You put your all into your marriage and he let you down, What should you do now?




You thought you found the perfect guy and right away you two clicked.  He was not so tall but he was very handsome.  All your conversations with your girlfriends were about him. They actually got tired of hearing his name over and over.

You thought that they were jealous, but they actually thought all along this guy wasn't for you.  So, you continued to date and he asked for your hand in marriage. You were the happiest that you have ever been in your life.

Fast forward four years and you now have two small children.  He never wanted you to go back to work because he didn't want anyone else raising his children so you made the sacrifice to honor his request to be a full-time stay-at-home mom.

For about two years you started to see signs that he was stressed out and he was seeing another woman but you hung in there to try to make your marriage work but now he totally wants out of the marriage.  What should you do?




You and your spouse are the only ones who know whether your marriage is over but I would tell you to not spend too much time trying to make a marriage work that is dead.  Talk to a Lawyer if you think a Divorce is on the horizon.

Your spouse is legally required to take care of your children financially and for you to help you get on your feet and back to work.

Think about going back to school to refresh your skills and make yourself marketable.  Volunteering is also a great way to acquire some experience while you are trying to get back into the workforce.  Keep moving forward and you will be okay.

Are You Feeling Like Damaged Goods?

Are You Feeling Like Damaged Goods?




Many times we have gone through life and think that we have made great strides and we have but, there are some places deep within where we are still broken.

You may have been very successful in your career and then all of a sudden, you are fired from your dream job, and you think of all the things that you have failed in your life. These feelings contribute to us being stuck in a holding pattern and you may be scared to try again and persevere.

It comes from brokenness from your childhood, or even from a spouse who treated you less than kind.  A broken marriage sometimes will signal your subconscious to inform you that you can never be happy, or if you try again, you will never succeed.

You don't realize that whatever you have gone through, you made it through, so that means that you overcame.  That is proof that you don't give up.

The older we get, we sometimes feel like damaged goods because so much time has passed and we feel like there is not enough time left to do the things that we would like to do.

I have been through so many obstacles in life and yes, at times I have those feelings of failure but, I have learned to get right back out there and continue to try again.

Never be envious of someone you think is more successful in life because you don't know their obstacles or their downfalls.  It may even be some negative things coming in their future and you don't know what they are dealing with.  They may be broken as well, but they know how to hide it.

To overcome obstacles means putting yourself out there which means that you can get hurt again but you will never know unless you try.

To truly be happy, you have to be determined to be happy and kind to everyone, because you will draw happy like-minded people into your life.

If you are living with an illness find someone else who is living with an illness as well, to find support but also to support others.

Spend a lot of time with animals and nature because it is very fulfilling.

Know that you will always be able to find another job so don't let a loss of a job get to you. Teach others the skills that you have and share your knowledge freely.

Forgive people who have hurt you but do not allow that same person the opportunity to hurt and damage you again.

People who are on a positive path in life are the ones you can draw happiness and blessings from.

If you notice all your friends are negative and really don't care for you, find a totally different type of friend to allow into your life because you usually draw what you are used to and is familiar to you.

Defeat generational curses and habits that only lead to failure because you don't have to live anyone else story, live your own.

Live and breath success and it will be yours!

Should I Continue To Buy Your Goods When I Cannot Use Your Restroom? (Rant)

Should I continue to buy your goods when I cannot use your restroom?



  My daughter and I like to go to a particular shopping area in the inner-city because you can always find some good deals on clothes, hair goods, linen, and etc.  I grew up shopping in this neighborhood and although the area has been sketchy for some time, we used to enjoy shopping there.

There are so many stores and places to eat in the area but guess what?  We can shop, and eat, but we cannot use their bathroom, we are always told that the bathroom is out of order or straight out told that we cannot use it.

My daughter went shopping in this area this week and she really had to go to the bathroom and it was an emergency.  She was told that she can't use the bathroom and she had to search and search she finally went to a place where she could go but she had to buy something in order to use the restroom.

We have always been told by others to patronize the inner city and their businesses but I don't think it makes sense to continue to support people who don't support us.  If I order food in your restaurant or buy your clothes and I know there is a bathroom and you treat me like a second-class citizen then it may now be a bad idea to keep spending my money in these run-down neighborhoods.

I can go to the mall where there is always an available bathroom and I don't have to ask whether or not I can use it.  I can shop in other supermarkets in different neighborhoods and I can use their facilities.

Some people have told me that a lot of stores are experiencing damage and a lot of people destroying the bathrooms and this is why they are restricting their use.  Well, people at the shopping mall will leave the bathroom dirty but there is always someone there to clean it up and I feel, these inner-city stores could do the same thing.

My money doesn't seem to be important in these areas or I would be treated with courtesy and with compassion.  So many people have physical ailments like myself and should not have to beg to use the bathroom.  We have to know that we are being treated unfairly and do something about it. I guess you really don't need my money, huh?

I do not care about your mom and pop stores if you are not aware of my needs. You have to make your customers your priority.  This is discrimination from our own race but nobody wants to admit it.

I will only support those who support me from now on!

Being Needy Is A Bad Trait And Character Flaw!

Being Needy Is A Bad Trait And Character Flaw!



There are so many people in this world who have the skills and the opportunity to make something out of themselves but there is something inside that tells them that they cannot accomplish anything so they think that the world owes them all the things that they cannot get.

I have to say that there is a population of people that actually need some help because of age or disability but it still doesn't give a person a right to attach themselves to your pocketbook because God will help those who help themselves.

You may think that you do not have control over your circumstance but you do; you have a mind that is powerful to create and give you the answers that you need, and all you have to do is put forth some effort.



If you cannot work, try to do the things that you can do and there will be someone out there who will help you get to the place where you want to be, but if you sit by expecting people to be your savior it will not help you at all.

Surround yourself with people who care about moving forward and are not takers because takers are distractors and they will wear you down.

Work on yourself and concentrate on what you can bring to the table and share yourself if you cannot share anything else.

Try not to feel sorry for yourself because we live in a world that rewards good behavior and our faithful attempts at bettering ourselves will not be void.


I have heard of people who come to America with just Twenty dollars and they fight and find a way to make it in this country because they are hungry and know that they have to make life in this country work.  They cannot afford to sit around and hope and dream of a change; they force the change.

If they can make it, you can, it depends on you making a change and making some careful decisions.  Learn how to save money on some things that you can do without so you can have a little extra money to change your life.  You may say, " I don't have much", well that man or woman who came to this country had a lot less than you.

You can do better and you know you can because living your dream is only possible if you depend on yourself and do for yourself.

A handout is only temporary but a hand up will take you so much further and when people see you trying, they will step in and help without you even asking for it.

Love is gone so what am I going to do?

Love is gone so what am I going to do?


Image Courtesy Of Pixabay.

It is not easy going through a breakup.  Spending time alone is rough unless you are a loner.  Finding new things to do and places to go alone can be so hard.

I have personally decided that I will remain alone for a while and concentrate on health and work on my career.  I am a  loner at heart and I personally enjoy my own company.

We have all these dating apps and websites and finding love is harder than ever.  Being alone is the best time to nurture all the things that you let go of when you were in a relationship.

I have decided to let love go but you don't have to, get yourself ready for new love and another adventure but take the time to find out exactly what you want in your relationship and some of the things that you would like to work on in your life to prevent another breakup.

Knowledge is power and although we cannot prevent some things that contribute to a breakup and a divorce, you can get to know yourself and what you will and will not put up with.  Maybe you will learn to be happy with your journey in life.

Taking trips and making plans are definite ways to get over your failed relationship.  Life is not over!
Find outings that are geared towards single folks, not to find another lover but to find new friends who know where all the hip and happening places are.

If you have let yourself go, now is the time to step up on your hygiene and fashion game.  Be you and be fabulous in your own right.