I Am Secretly Getting Married Next Week.

Image Courtesy Of Pixabay
Anonymous Question:  Hello, Sasha.  I am getting married next week and I haven't told my family and my fiance hasn't told anyone in his family.

  I do not have a great relationship with my mom and dad because they never acted like they cared anything about me.  I feel invisible in my family.

 My sisters are in their own little world and they really could care less.  We are going to Las Vegas and we are talking about moving to Philadelphia.  Right now, I live in Chicago and there are not a whole lot of jobs here.  I  have been looking to make a new start.  I need your advice.


Sashamoniquetalks:  First, I want to say that I am happy for you but I think that you should give your mom and dad a chance to see you get married.

  At least talk to them about it.  You didn't tell me your age but If you are eighteen and over, you have the right to get married if you want to, but the negative energy that will occur if you do not give your family a chance to see you married would be long-lasting.

  You sound like you made up your mind and I wish you well in your marriage.

I Want To Get Married And I Want A Beautiful Ring!

Hello, Ladies. I had a conversation a few years ago with an acquaintance of mine and I am sure that she is okay with me sharing this.  She is forty plus and she has never been married.  She is a wonderful, God-fearing, and respectable lady, and she would be the perfect catch for any man.  She has dated some men and she knows exactly what she wants.

She asked me why I wear rings and who bought them and I told her that some were bought by other people and some were bought by me.  She then asked me why I would buy my own and I told her that, at my age, I cannot wait for someone to give me the gifts that I can give myself.

I have been married, so I was quite alarmed that she even asked me this question but I know that she was just asking a question.  She then said that she was waiting for the big, beautiful, diamond ring that would come when the right guy finds her and asked for her hand in marriage.

She then asked me why I don't just wear the rings on my right hand and I told her that, at my age, it doesn't really matter what hand I used to display my rings.

I am going to keep it real here and say that a lot of us are waiting for a dream that may not come true.
If you are forty years old and over, you should just buy the beautiful things that you want to wear and that fantastic diamond ring that you love and enjoy it.  The man of your dreams will still come if it is meant to be, even if you are wearing diamonds.

Some of us ladies are separated or divorced and we may not even be looking for another relationship but I want you ladies to keep looking good for yourself and spoil yourself if it is within your means.

A statement ring, bracelet, or necklace doesn't have to be expensive.  Never put your happiness on hold because you are waiting for love.  Live now, because tomorrow isn't promised.

Put some money aside and buy that big beautiful ring that you want and wear it with pride.  Love yourself because nobody is going to love you more.

How to find a good man.

Hello, Ladies.  A lot of you want to know how to find a good man and what characteristics are associated with a good man.  Below you will see different videos speaking on this subject.  Watch these videos and also take notes.

                          Steve, Where Can I Find A Good Man?

                          Steve Harvey's Advice For Successful Women Who                              Can't Find A Good Man

                            How To Find A Good Black Man

                    The Qualities Of A Good Man- Dr. Myles Munroe                                                                                                                          

 

She is asking for a Divorce but I don't want one.

Anonymous Question:  I got married very young to this beautiful lady and we have been married six years.  I am very attracted to her and she is in great shape.  The problem is, that we have one child together but I have put her down many times and made fun of her about her looks.

 She looks fine but I am really jealous of her and very insecure with myself. I have slapped her on many occasions and I refuse to let her go out with her friends because I am scared she will find someone else. 

 She has filed for a Divorce but I do not want one and I am willing to change my way's.  I forgot to add that I have two kids from another relationship while married to her.  How can I get my beautiful wife back?

SashaMoniqueTalks:  You said that you got married very young and you do not want a Divorce but honestly, you did not give your wife the love and respect that she deserves.  I believe that you love her but the way you showed it, confused her.

 What you can do is call her and tell her all the things that you told me and give her space and time to see if she still want to work on her marriage.  You made a mistake by hitting her and I wouldn't suggest that any woman stays with a man who hits her. 

 You prevented her from going out with her friends while you went out and had two kids on her.  If you two get back together,  you must give her space and a chance to enjoy her life and plan some wonderful things that you know she would like.  Make her happy and never treat her like this again.  If you are truly sorry, you may get her back.

He Stayed With The Other Woman On Valentines Day (Update)

Anonymous:  Hello, Sasha.  I have an update on the question that I had on Valentine's Day.  I told you that my husband stayed with the other woman on Valentine's Day and I am so happy right now because I told him that I was unhappy in my marriage and he didn't give me the respect or the attention that I needed. 

 I could not take it anymore and I asked him to move out.  I felt sad for about two weeks but Sasha, I am so relieved and I have been going out with my friends and really having a good time.  Wasn't aware of how tied down I was.  

He asked me to let him come back home and he said that he really loves me.  I flat out told his crazy behind that I will never let him come back and I am glad that he is gone. Some other opportunities have opened up for me in my career and I am happy about that.  Ten years is too long to be miserable and I got my life back.


SashaMoniqueTalks:  I am so surprised to hear back from you. So glad that you took the steps to fix this situation and happiness and contentment is very important.  That is great news about the opportunities that has opened up for you.  You are no longer tied down and you are free to live and be happy. Wishing you the best blessings and please stay in touch with me.

He Is Being Cheap. Should I Buy My Own Engagement Ring

Anonymous Question, Sasha, I have been dating this man for a year and he was talking about marriage on a regular basis.  He asked me whether I was ready for marriage or not and I said, Yes. 

 I love him but he took me to the jewelry stores looking for a ring and we saw many that I like.  He said, "I didn't know that they cost so much."  I said to myself "Listen to this cheapskate."  He started looking at some cheap, flimsy rings that had diamonds that look like salt.

I was upset, but, I understand that he is having some financial issues.   He dresses well and he gets things that he likes, so why is he being cheap about my ring. 

I am mad about this situation and I am ready to buy my own engagement ring because I refuse to wear an ugly, cheap ring. Don't get me wrong, I am not a gold digger but, I do like nice things.  Should I buy my own ring, Sasha?

Sashamoniquetalks,  You said that you love this man but, if he cannot afford to buy you a ring that you like, you will have to either get an affordable ring that you like or you will have to wait until this man can afford to buy you the ring of your dreams.  

I would not suggest that someone goes into debt for these kinds of purchases and I am not going to call you a gold digger.

 There are other options like Pawn shops, eBay, Mercari, Poshmark, and also Walmart.  You will be surprised about the quality rings that they sell at these places and also, down the line, you could get a more expensive ring.  

I will not suggest that you buy your own ring, but, you could tell him that you will put some money towards it.  If none of these options work for you, then maybe you should wait to get married. He may not even be in the position to marry anyone.