He stayed with the other woman on Valentine's Day.

Anonymous Question:  Hello Sasha, I have been with my husband for ten years and he only spent two Valentine's Day with me since we have been married.  He spends all his time with his other woman and he leaves and stays a few days.  He likes to start an argument every time he leaves, what can I do?


Sashamoniquetalks:  Hello, this a very sad situation.  Your husband is showing some signs that he doesn't respect you or your feelings.  I am sure that he loves you but he wants his cake and eat it too. You need to have a serious talk with him about your future and if he won't talk, you may need to text him or write him a letter.
You have been married a long time and you don't deserve this treatment.  I am not going to tell you to leave your husband but take this time to work on you and make yourself happy. When working on yourself you will find the right answer that you have been seeking and he will see a new change in you.

Please let me know how this situation turns out.

How To Deal With A Liar

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                                   How To Deal With A Liar

All of us have come across people who stretch the truth and we brush it off but this person can be really dangerous.  You will not be able to believe anything that they say.  Some will tell you a story with a straight face and they always had a sob story to gain your confidence.

  They have no trouble asking you for money and they are always looking for someone to finance their latest pursuits.

How To Deal With A Liar:
When you find out that this person is a habitual liar, cut all contact with them if you can.  If they ask you for money, firmly tell them NO!
Closely, evaluate what they are telling is fact or fiction. 

 Treat this person like a Leper even if it hurts their feelings.  Do not invite this liar to family events because they are known to cause arguments with other family members.

A Liar is a thief:
I was always told that if a person lies he will also steal.  This means, if this person is in your home you will have to guard your valuables.  Never leave them alone in your home.

Bottom Line:
Liars are meant to be discarded like trash and you may care for them if they are family but you cannot continue to waste your time because these people are detrimental to your health and they are psychopaths.  

To All Hypocritical Fat People (Plus Size)

I was watching a talk show this morning and a plus-size host stated that most of her boyfriends are much smaller than her.  You surely have a choice who you want to date but I have heard many plus size women say that they absolutely would not date a fat man. 

I am a plus size lady and we have, to be honest with ourselves; if we want a man to find us attractive, we cannot be so one-sided.  I think it is a prejudicial to put all fat men into the undesirable category because it is not fair.

When a man fat shames us, we call them a pig and a fool but we should extend the same to fat women who speak negatively about fat men, Honestly, if you think they are funny looking, maybe you are funny looking too. Would I date one?  Yes, and I have and this man was a wonderful person.

I am starting to see some prime time shows who feature super plus size men and women and I think this is a wonderful thing because plus size people would not have their own show or they always had to be portrayed as a desperate fat woman or a funny fat man. 

 We have come a long way and I love the prime time television show "This Is Us."  In the near future, our children will be able to see some positive role models who are plus size.  Remember (plus size people) will always be with us, so why not embrace plus size models, actor and people in our everyday life.

He Was On Top Of His Game ( Blind Item)

Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen.  Here is a blind item for you.

There is a male singer who has a fantastic voice.  Went to an event back in the late 1990s and this singer who was at the top of his game was standing near the wall and nobody would talk to him or acknowledge him.

  I was embarrassed for him because his songs are very famous and have even been featured in major movies.

There were many other stars in the room at the time and they wouldn't even talk to him.  He has a really strong voice and you would know his voice anywhere.  I don't have any of the details why everyone was treating him this way but it is really sad.

Other entertainers were asked to come up on the stage to have a jam session and a well-known Guitarist took the stage along with other singers and still no one ever mentioned his name.  This singer stayed till the party was over but I think I would have left early.

I was even surprised that he didn't even have a date with him.  Talking about a brush-off, that was the ultimate!

Is It Wise To Stay Friends With Your EX?

Is It Wise To Stay Friends With Your EX?

It depends if you had a terrible breakup where you could not talk to this person and they have done very bad things to you in the past.  You must take into account all the things that led up to your breakup. 

 If there was any kind of abuse I would say "Don't Do It!"  You will cause yourself so much pain and suffering.

If this man is in a relationship at the moment, I would tell you to leave him alone because you do not need the drama that will ensue from calling or texting this Man. 

 I have stayed friends with people I was dating in the past because maybe it wasn't such a bad breakup or we have more things in common as friends.

If you can talk to this person and don't have any romantic feelings for this Man, you can chat with him and sometimes go out to the movies and etc.  Do not sleep with this man because you do not want to stir up old feelings that are meant to stay buried.

Be honest with yourself and if you enjoy talking to this person, stay friends.  He may even be able to introduce you to a nice person you can date.

Should I Go Back To School?

Hello, everyone.  A good friend of mine asked me this question and I decided to answer it here.  My friend is in her late 40s and she has five kids ranging from the age of 10 to 23 and she works full time.  

She wants to go back to school to finally get her degree.  She found out her job is going to be laid off and she said that she plans to go back to school, while she is on unemployment.  She asked me whether or not she is too old to be going back to school.

I would never tell anyone not to go back to school because it is great to have an education but I feel that if you have to take out student loans, you will have to pay those back and it can cause hardship. 

 If you are getting reimbursed by your employer it would be worth it.  You are not too old to finish school but it is very important to get a degree in a field that have lots of jobs such as the medical field because we do face a lot of age discrimination when we are in our forties or fifties. 

There are a lot of middle-aged people who decide to start their own business after getting their degree and it is a great idea.  You are the only person who will know whether or not it is financially feasible to go back to school.  I am very proud of you and I wish you the best.

Have You Ever Been In A Bad Relationship But Was Scared To Get Out? SashaMoniqueTalks Breaking Down Barriers

 Hello, everyone.  Have you ever been in love with someone and you just know that you two cannot get along but deep down you really love this person and don't know how to end the relationship?  Well, I have and it is not a place that I would ever like to revisit. 

 I can remember my heart pounding and the tears flowing.  I remember questioning myself and wondering whether it was my fault that the relationship was not working.  Removing myself from this situation was heartbreaking and very hard to do.

This place and space where I was, was not healthy and I knew that I had to make a move to save myself.  Below, you will see some of the steps that I had to take and where I am now, and how my mindset changed.

How I saved my life.

1. Went to the Library and found self-help books to rebuild my self-esteem and to see where I went wrong in the relationship.
2. Learned to love myself and concentrate on all of my needs.
3. I decided that I would not concentrate on looks when looking for a mate and to see what was in the man's heart and that he was genuinely in love with me instead of in lust with me. lol
4. I sincerely prayed for God's guidance and instruction on how to move forward in a positive way.
5. I made the decision not to date for a while and learn to be happy as a single woman.
6. I kept myself so busy, so I didn't feel like I was missing something.
7. Bought me some special gifts for Valentine's Day to celebrate, me.
8. Started a few hobbies that help to keep my mind off, love and relationships.
9. Went to some events alone and still had a wonderful time.
10. Learned how to have friendships with men, without having the pressure of dating.

I have decided that having a relationship doesn't define who I am.  I am wonderful and fabulous, just the way I am, and really glad that I don't have all the drama that was in my life. 

 Trusting your intuition is a way to avoid getting yourself into dangerous and non-productive situations.  You have to realize what all the red flags are and learn to avoid them at all costs.

When you have high self-worth; Men who would ordinarily talk to you will pass you by and that will make room for men of quality to come into your life.

You deserve a life with a man who will celebrate you and who will add to your life in a positive manner.  Life is short; please do not settle for a man who is unstable because you will be miserable.